If you read my blog, you know that I am leaving the corn state to move to the state of the red rocks and beautiful sunsets. Part of me will miss being a country boy, and the other will love leaving the stupid bipolar weather. I don't have too many friends that I honestly care about or hangout with here so I won't really miss them (no offense), but the thing I am scared about the most is being prepared for going down there. The second is pleasing people. For some reason it has always been my goal to get others approval and to make others proud instead of focusing on God and I's relationship. I mean, I can try all I want to make me happy, but I will get no where without God. I will always need his approval to make my life easier.
Another thing that I am HAPPY about, is seeing my little brother and puupy, Bailey again. Both bring greats joy in my life. David is just a great kid, I swear you won't find another kid who has such a willing spirit to help or learn. He just wants a friend and example to look up too, which will be me when I get down there. Also, Bailey. The best dog I could have ever asked for. I can read her like a book and she understands me all too well too.
Basically what I am going to Arizona for is to get help with my mental disabilities AKA BIPOLAR disorder, ADD, and whatever else I have that strays me away from getting things done. Being bipolar sucks butt, because it is such an emotional roller coaster... One minute you are up and ready to take on the world and the next your ready to die and jump off a cliff. Some days you are in the middle and things are just, bleh, then the next day things cause just be stellar! It is really emotionally exhausting. It also makes your mind race and think about negative things that you would never think about on a daily basis. All I can say is I am looking forward to getting my mental status taken care of, and that I am glad my family is willing to help me out on my journey. Without them I am nothing. They are always there for me in my greatest times of need.
Prayers, love, and thoughts for me would and are greatly appreciated. I could use them. I get discouraged a lot and sometimes it is hard to get out of that rut. I want to be all manly and just tough it out but sometimes that only makes it worse. MEH! Oh well, life is life and I will be able to enjoy the pleasures of Arizonas scenery and nature which makes me happy.
Love God Love People Influence Everyone with your Actions
SAM PAUL
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